The Big Ghost Review for Cole World: The Sideline Story

Ayo whattup its ya boy P-Tone aka Volcano Hands aka Phantom Raviolis aka Cocaine Biceps nahmean! Word up the Hands of Zeus is in the buildin. Lotta niggas been askin the god  "Ayo Thor Molecules when you gon review that Memphis Cole joint?" Aint like the god was frontin but a nigga been mad busy namsayin so we hadda put that shit on ice while Riggatone handled that other shit nahmean. But Im pretty sure ey'body hadda chance to illegally download that shit by now so lets get this shit poppin b. First off young Eeyore lookin like some nigga jus snatched his balloon animals from him on this cover yo. That shit need to be addressed rite now son. Jermaine lookin like he jus got violated in the showers n he tryin to figure out a way to explain it to his girl. Im sayin yo...is this nigga capable of a facial expression that dont make him look like a victim son? 

Cmon Jermaine...you spose to be celebratin the fact that Jiggaman lettin you drop ya album finally yo! Nah he aint takin you on tour wit him n Yeezy but you can still sell some merch on ya own tour baby pa. Niggas can stop askin why a dude who aint got no album is doin a muthafuckin 65 date world tour like he Bono or some shit now yo! Whatever tho son...lets get this shit started b...

1.  Intro - Son jus explainin to a couple niggas how he wanna tell the story of the day he got signed...instead he spits a couple bars tho. Lotta dope albums got dope intros...sometimes its skits...sometimes its jus niggas buildin n talkin shit....Amerikkkas Most Wanted, Ready To Die, The Chronic, Illmatic, The Dynnasty, Cuban Linx....Lotta classic joints yo. Word.....this aint like those.

2. Dollar and a Dream III - This beat sounds like Puffy circa Life After Death was in the studio wit his toothpick in his mouth tellin niggas to "put more cinematic on it" while niggas looked at each other shakin they heads n shit namsayin. Word...the little homie Jermaine got his Nashiem Myrick n Carlos Broady on. But instead a spittin some gutter ass tales bout robbin niggas or clappin niggas kids by accident...son jus doin what HE be doin best namsayin. Which is cool nahmean....but this nigga jus gettin his Eeyore on again b. Aint much here that this nigga can tell us that he aint already weeped bout before son. We get it nigga...you was unsigned...n now you signed. Word...dreams really do come true n niggas shouldnta doubted ya ass.... Son always gotta squeeze in AT LEAST one lame bar tho. On this joint its "boy you cant outsmart me....I  make you fee like you the shit, but boy you cant out-fart me"

3. Cant Get Enough (ft Trey Songz) - This shit sounds like the nigga hopped in his time machine n copped a beat that Twista aint wanna pay Kanye for in 2003 yo. This muthafucka sound dated as fuck son. I was almost expectin this nigga to start rhymin bout poppin tags n shit. But I aint really mad at this joint. It is what it is yo. Lame bar (that ey'body at his shows gon scream when the music stops n he points the mic at the crowd): "I love when you give me heeeeaaaaad...I hate when you give me headaches"

4. Lights Please - Ayo when this beat started the god was thinkin "Word...... . NOWTHISWHATTHEFUCKUMMTALMBOUT!" Son...a nigga was thinkin the intro to the joint was dope as shit...like this bout to be a problem namsayin. One minute in n this nigga still rhymin over the intro...the beat aint change yet or nothin...cool. Guess the little nigga tryin to make a point...BUT NAH...the hook comes in n the muthafuckin beat still sound like the intro son (by the way yo....you kno how all the hooks Drizzy be croonin sound like he makin em up as he go? Word...it sound kinda like this nigga gettin his Drake on here forreal yo...except son dont be hittin those bitch notes as much)  Lame bar: "Laid a nigga down proper like she was recordin tracks" 

5. Interlude - This nigga interruptin his album to finish off the story from his intro namsayin....the one niggas probably already forgot bout n shit. Personally I feel like son jus wanted to be on some "oh by the way shit" n mention that he had to pay the price for "drivin dirty" one time....wit no license nahmean. Eventually yo...the law caught up to the little nigga n he went to jail b....for the nite. 

6. Sideline Story - This beat kinda cool....feels like some shit where you might be in a nice restaurant eatiin some lobster tails or some scampi or primavera type joint n listenin to some shit like that namsayin... n then some unsigned random nigga grabs the mic n starts spittin his bars or whatever. The hook sounds like some shit Drake mighta left on sons voicemail again. Lame bar: "my hooks can knock Rocky out" Smh...swear Grandmaster Caz probably came up wit that one in like '82 n then crumpled that shit up into a paper ball n came wit some better shit yo.

7. Mr Nice Watch (ft Jay-Z) Oh shit par....its that Jay feature that almost became sons 905th L in 3 years when Hovi aint give this nigga a 16 til the day shit was bout to get mastered yo. Too bad he jumped on a track that sounds like some shit that a Timbaland stan from like Croatia or Qatar or some shit laced in his bedroom son. The hook is pure muthafuckin struggle my nigga...I aint even gon get into it yo. Somebody tell this nigga he dont gotta croon on ALL these joints tho b. Jiggaman gave this nigga one a his "Oh its for Bleek's joint? Aight here ya go" verses. Jay knows when he in danger of gettin renegaded....n that shit wasnt gon be happenin here son. Son couldnta renegaded Lil Boosie on this shit b. Word is bond son. Lame bar: "I rap like its Christmas Eve" ....Cmon Jermaine. 

8. Cole World - This beat got more of that same Euro nigga swag that the last joint had. Its cool if niggas wanna get on some international shit n show some variety or some culture b....but this beat kinda ass yo. This sounds like some shit that muthafuckas in Moscow be doin Russian kicks to....like you gotta be splashin 180 proof vodka on slave bitches n rockin a bear skin coat wit the head still on it to really appreciate shit like this son. Then this nigga get on some Borat shit durin the hook when he singin "Got a hundred fifty bitches in the club starin' at me/ How that feel? Very happy!" Yall listen to this shit tho..."How that feel? VERY HAPPY". Son...thats some "no speaky inglish" type shit yo. This joint starts out wit the line "it took me all day to find some inspiration"...ayo maybe you shoulda put it back where you found it son. Cos apparently you found that shit in the back of a gypsy caravan or some shit b. You want lame bars tho? Son be spittin darts like "See my man Nate, asked me if I gained weight/ I said nah, my pockets got fatter, that's all", "I got the type of shit that make a hater say sorry" n "Bitch, I made this in the crib, watchin' Belly/ eatin' peanut butter jelly, what the fuck can niggas tell me?" n all kindsa dogshit bars...take ya pick yo. Its like a wackass bars smorgasbord on this shit b.

9. In The Morning (ft The Kitten Whisperer) - Damn son....you kno the album aint really goin rite for a nigga when you relieved to hear the Drizzy joint nahmean. Still think this beat is dope...which kinda makes sense namsayin since this joint one a the only ones that Jermaine aint produce by hisself. Word is bond yo...this nigga gave all his best beats away to muthafuckas like Kendrick (see HiiiPoWeR) n XV (peep Smallville) namsayin. Kinda forgot that Aubrey sounds like a rapist on this shit tho nahmean. I think the nigga talmbout how he use to fuck horses when he was a kid in his verse or some shit son. N even tho Young Angel droppin bars bout ridin stallions n shootin lotion outta his finger tips... this little nigga Cole aka L-ton John STILL gon find a way to squeeze in the lamest bar on this shit wit "no strings attached, like a cordless phone" Son...when was the last time you seen a phone that DID have a cord yo? You write this verse in 1987 g? Cmon son...its 2011 yo. Cordless phones? That shits like sayin "word...I got these condoms that aint made outta lamb intestines son" or "word....I gotta TV that aint black n white at my crib namsayin" or "word....I like broads who dont got mustaches or dicks yo". Stop it Jermaine...

10. Lost Ones - First off yo...this shit got pretty much the same drumbeat as the Lights Out joint...which really be drivin home that point that son been runnin outta ideas for beats a long ass time now yo. But SON...on a album full of bitchified lotiony hooks...this shit might actually be the the lotioniest n bitchifiedest hook of them all yo... "I aint too proud to tell you that I cry sometimes...I cry sometimes about it...." 

Son...is you fuckin serious? Shit gets even more bitched out when the nigga starts spittin from the perspective of a pregnant broad for the whole second verse. "I let you hit it raw muthafucka...now Im pregnant". Word...mad niggas is gon be spittin along to that shit b. Nas dont even get away wit doin shit like that son...

11. Nobody's Perfect (Ft Missy Elliot) - I aint mad at this beat...shit is actually cool for some R&B nigga shit. Plus Missy took it back yo. This still jus some shit for broads that eat ice cream under the covers n keep candy bars in they glove box...but its cool for what it is yo. The little homie Jermaine aint forget to spit some more lame bars on this shit tho. Word yo...the lamest one gotta be "Cole heatin up like that leftover lasagna" ....wow. The hood probably gon love that one yo...."YO YOU HEAR WHAT THIS NIGGA JUS SAID SLIME?? HE HEATIN UP....LIKE LEFTOVER LASAGNA NIGGA!!! DAMN YO!!! REWIND THAT BACK SLIME!!!

12. Never Told - This some Captain Save A Hoe shit son. Theres a skit in the middle bout a young Jermaine learnin how to be a man. Apparently son use to sound like a little broad when he was young tho...couldnt make it to the end of this one b. NO.I.D. gave the nigga a throwaway beat too. Lamest bar: "Cause Wolverine's depressing, don't wanna be your ex-man"

13. Rise And Shine - Son saved his best beat for damn near the end of the album yo. Either way tho...son hooked up a ferocious track to go hammer on son.....before he lames out on the hook n sings some wack shit again. This song is like a dime broad witta 5 inch ortho shoe on b. Too bad son... Dont think that son forgot to spit some wackness on this shit too yo. Lamest bar: "These words Im recordin got me ballin....Jordan". 

14. God's Gift - This the joint son was hopin Jay would jump on. Shits definitely better than that Nice Watch eurotrash shit he did end up jumpin on tho. Son referencin Jay n talmbout "on to the blueprint" but Jay was like "Nah". So disrespectful Hovi....Of course son gotta squeeze in another wack ass made up as he go hook torn straight outta the book of Aubrey nahmean. Lamest bars: "Pussy my passion / Man I just can’t help it,I see a cookie, I grab one"

15. Breakdown - The drums by theyselves on the intro sound like some bullshit yo. Shit be soundin cheap as fuck son. Sounds like some shit a niggas moms would tap out while she fuckin witta niggas MPC in his room.  Once the music kicks in its aight tho. Rite out the gate yo...son spits "I just shed tears homie and now I aint too proud to admit it"...we get it son. You aint ashamed to cry...stop all that sad face purple donkey shit already par. The song aint horrible...but I dont kno what nigga would end they album witta joint like this one. Lamest bars: "Thought I was brighter than a Polo sweater / No pops.... was like Martin with no Coretta"

Bonus Tracks:

I aint really kno which joints is officially on his shit but these muthafuckas is summa the bonus tracks I got on my version yo....

Workout - The first official single off this shit jus became a bonus track yo. Truth be told...this joint was cool for what it was. The video was another story tho son...that shit looked like son got the director who use to do shit for TLC on they first album b. That shit musta costed Roc Nation like$300 yo. Jay probably drops more on socks than what he givin this nigga for his video budget b. I fucks wit this shit...like it aint my favorite shit or nothin b...but I dont hate it like that. But when son starts gettin his Paula Abdul on its time for the skip button.

Nothing Lasts Forever - More shit for broads who aint got no self esteem n niggas who stay twistin Nuvo caps off n sippin Shirley Temples at the club. Its a cool joint but son spittin some serious snore darts on this one b. 

Daddy's Little Girl - The beat cool...in a "nigga who jus learned how to use Reason" kinda way. But the hook so light in the ass that my muthafuckin iPod started floatin round the room while I was playin this shit b. You can put a black coffee in front of the speakers n that shit gon have 5 sugars in it by the end of the song par. This shit softer than chinchilla bellies yo. You could pollinate your flower garden wit this shit b. This niggas dignity tank is on E when it comes to these hooks son...but whatever yo. 

Who Dat - Aka the original first single flop....Only good thing I can say bout this shit is he aint really spit any lazy ass bars like he did all over his album yo. He barely gettin his songstress on on this shir too yo. Son shoulda spent more than 4 seconds comin up wit the hook for this muthafucka tho son. 

Cheer Up - I dont even kno if this joint is really a bonus track forreal yo...n I aint heard it...but thats a funny ass song title comin from this nigga b.

Thats bout it fam...I aint really mad at this shit...but son was lazy as fuck on this joint b. The beats...the rhymes...all that shit yo. I thought son woulda been savin his best shit for his album my nigga. There aint really a whole lot to make this shit that different from his mixtapes tho son. N word is bond yo...the rap world always been divided between niggas who dont sound wack singin all over they joints (Pac, 50, DMX, Slick Rick, GHOSTFACE etc) n niggas who sound like straight bitches when they do namsayin (Aubrey).....Cole be fallin into that second category yo. What you gon do tho? These beige niggas jus love to croon on they shit b. But yo...I aint mad at this shit like that baby pa. The nigga gettin his feet wet in the game still...its cool...broads gon more or less love this like a fat kid love cake n all that. It jus aint the gods cuppa tea namsayin. Staten niggas be drinkin from golden goblets b. We dont drink no Ovaltines namsayin. We drink broken glass son. Niggas stay eatin the bark off the trees over here par. You talkin to some official titanium beard niggas who rock iron headbands n throw Suzuki jeeps at niggas for steppin on our footwear nahmean. So nah...niggas who got that viking blood dont be really fuckin wit no soft ass shit like this b. But this shit wasnt designed for niggas like Tone yo...I understands that shit b. This shit was designed to tap that insecure broad demographic n shit par. So instead a breakin this muthafuckas wings off Imma jus open the window n let the butterfly go back to the flower box n do his thing namsayin. Let youngin do him I guess yo...

Overall...on some generous shit...Imma give Eeyorematic 2.5 outta 5 Zeus Slaps yo.....or 5 Memphis Bleek durags under the fitted outta 5. Word is bond.

Aight peace.

The 4th Annual 10 Softest Niggas In The Game

Ayo whattup its ya boy P-Tone aka Thor Molecules aka Volcano Hands aka Cocaine Biceps namsayin. Ya boy is back in the building once again. Yall already kno what it is son. Its that time a year where we honor the softest muthafuckas in the game...the niggas thats so light in the ass that if you kick them they probably float into outer space namsayin. These the muthafuckas that could jus cut the tip of they fingers to pour syrup on ya pancakes for you. These the niggas we recognizin today son. Word is bond yo. You could scratch these niggas witta cotton ball b. Straight up.

Lessgo...

10. KREAYSHAWN



Oh wait...my bad son....that one aint her...



Aight here she is yo...

This broad coulda been #1 on this list...but she technically female...so I aint really kno how to approach that shit son. I mean...Tone dont really like no brolic ass chicks neither namsayin. Word n I dont need no broad to be confusin me on some Rah Digga shit neither yo. Dont get me wrong tho...this broad is wack as every single fuck known to man.....but I aint sweatin her softness like that nahmean. That aint the problem son. The problems that she been causin that shit to spread like wildfire yo. Theres even niggas in the industry thats gettin drawn into this bullshit nahmean. Word is bond...I mean...it aint no big shock that the emperor of softness hisself...you might kno the nigga as Aubrey....aka The Kitten Whisperer...jus LOVES her shit son. In the meantime that fool Ricky Ross been talkin in interviews bout how he gon put up 50 Gs to "mess up her whole week" namsayin...cos she was makin jokes bout the nigga bein kinda "chubby" n shit like that. I mean I fucks wit that nigga Rozay's music namsayin...but I dont wanna see the nigga gettin baited into bickerin wit some 4 ft tall white broad n talkin like he gon have the bitch executed when ey'body kno that that shit aint gon happen. The gods issues wit this muthafucka go a little deeper than jus her music namsayin. This broad gon open up the floodgates for all types a softassnigganess...mainly from white dudes who rock cornrows n braids or trailer park bitches who seen Set it Off one too many times namsayin. Which gon bring us to...

9. V-Nasty

This that wigger brude who rolls wit KREAYSHAWN....jus in case you aint up on all the wackest fake shit out there namsayin. Aint like I wanna give either a these NIGGAS more shine...but that broad KREAYSHAWN gon be a household name regardless yo. Muthafuckas jus love some wack ass shit...so she gon be famous for a hot ass minute son. But this V-Nasty brude probably gon disappear off the map a lot sooner than that yo. This muthafucka is devoid of talent, looks....talent....or anything else that would bring her dumb ass  some success namsayin. Listen to her bullshit ass music if you think Im playin son...

When I hear shit like this I jus be thinkin "Wow...this bitch might actually be retarded yo". If you read the youtube comments you see ratchet ass shit like...



"v'nasty qoesx so hard for a white girl (:"





"Don't need a pass to say nigga. Shut your bitch mouths you wanna have a word to yourselfs to fucking bad NIGGA! Ill say what I want and im white as fuck. and yes Ill say that straight to yo black face NIGGA"





"Omgee VNasty Be Going Hammmm I Dont Car What NOBODY Says Team V-Nasty



Ayo this jus some ignorant music for soft ass ignorant muthafuckas yo. Get this shit the fuck outta here son.

8. MTV RiFF RaFF

Speakin of white dudes wit cornrows n braids....Nah ya eyes aint deceivin you par...If you aint never hearda this cornball ass muthafucka before its probably cos you dont hang out in trailer parks or search "WACKEST SHIT ON EARTH" on google enough namsayin. Son....we was mad at Vanilla Ice back in the 90s yo. This muthafucka is like the T-1000 version of Vanilla Ice my nigga. Newwww.....Improoooooved Vanilla Ice. I quit. I never thought I was gon see a white boy coon this fuckin hard EVER son. This muthafucka musta been injected wit the blood of Soulja Boy in his sleep yo. Son look like he a failed experiment that was designed by the government to spy on niggas in Magnolia Projects n shit....in 1998. The level of wackness this muthafucka capable of could probably make Fubu visors rain from the sky b. This muthafucka could probably cross his arms n blink n have you wearin a G-Unit sweatsuit without you knowin it son. Look at this cracker son...

Not only did this powder coon get a MTV logo tatted on his neck...but he actually got a BET logo n a World Star one to go wit it. On his actual flesh son...FOR. EV. ER. Nah yo...fuck this cracker, fuck his pulse, n fuck his heartbeat....fuck his moms, his kids, his unborn...I dont give a fuck yo. I dont be wishin death upon nobody but this muthafucka need to die son. 

Real Bloods rock blue....Soo woooo!

7. Game

This nigga always goin outta his way to make it hard to like him b. Niggas already gave up on tryin to get this muthafucka to stop actin like a damn goupie yo. He gon dickride...whatever I guess. He wanna namedrop still...*shrug*. He wanna throw rocks then hide his hand...hey..what ya gon do rite? Im sayin yo...niggas done FORGAVE this muthafucka for nonstop wack shit b. Word is bond.

I mean...niggas looked the other way when that Change Of  Hearts shit footage popped up.

Niggas tried to ignore the fact that son use to rock thongs n strip for doe.

Then the nigga got a butterfly tatted on his damn face....

But somebody musta told the nigga that that shit was mad fruity (SURPRISE NIGGA!)...So he probably got to thinkin "Ayo Imma cover that shit up witta Dodgers logo yo....Dre gon love that shit" But you could still see the butterfly underneath it so son was was like..."Ayo why dont I throw a big ass red star on that too...Dre gon love that shit".  Niggas of course gave that shit a pass too yo. So jus to push his luck a little more..the nigga was like.."Hmmm maybe I should start rockin a red mohawk yo....Dre gon love that shit". Niggas STILL tried to ignore that shit b. What more does this nigga want from us yo? All that cryin he done did in interviews...the bullshit beefin...squeezin hisself into the picture...jockin niggas styles...SON. Im sayin tho...this emotional ass nigga need to figure his life out.

6. Brandy's Brother

Ayo Tone does not fuck wit this niggas music one bit son. But apparently he still singin his heart out n tryin to stay relevant yo. This niggas most famous joint is one he did wit Yung Berg....I mean...that shit kinda says it all b. But this nigga got into some kinda squabble wit Fabolous in Vegas a few days ago...before the Mayweather fight. Niggas is sayin he got walloped... meanwhile he sayin he beat Fabs ass down before the nigga went on stage to perform yo. I cant call it cos I wasnt there tho namsayin. All I kno is Brandys brother went on a rampage on the radio n on some video n shit...talmbout he gon send niggas to come rape Fab if he aint apologize by sundown or some shit like that. I dont kno what kinda nigga got rape goons on deck like that...but apparently Brandy related to a nigga who do. Son was basically talkin like he a made nigga tho...jus cos his sister be buyin him mad cars n shit like that. Nigga we get it...ya big sister holdin you down n buyin you all that luxurious shit you cant afford on ya own. Ayo Brandy dont gotta prove nothin else namsayin. She had her run. She good nahmean. But you been doin backstrokes in Lake Mediocre for ya whole career b. Have a seat nigga.

5. Medium Sean

This nigga is a diva son. All this nigga dreams bout is bein famous n havin shiny shit to wear. Thats basically all the nigga talks bout in his songs too. Son that shit is tired yo.......wheels. You been slippin b....eels. I said you slippin b....peels. You sound like a bitch....squeals. Grow up nigga....heels. Niggas dont got time for all that  basic ass shit you doin son. You jussa half trick pony yo. Fuckouttahere..........Foxy Brown career.

4. Yung Berg



Ayo the god jus read some shit the other day bout how this nigga done squashed his beef wit Ne-Yo. Lemme repeat that shit for yall muthafuckas one time... I said this nigga jus squashed his beef wit NE-YO son. As in this nigga...

First off...if them two niggas is havin issues wit each other... that aint no beef son. That shit is LAMB. Them two niggas was jus lambin yo. Straight up. Far as what that shit was all bout...I got no fuckin idea son. I dont mean no disrespect to the nigga Ne-Yo...son is what he is. But what more you gon say bout this nigga Berg? Son is a L-caholic my nigga. This niggas been sucklin on the titty of failure for way too long yo. Son aint tryin to pass the torch to the nex nigga at all b. When this nigga sits down in the morning to eat his Alpha-Bits that shit is all L's son. This niggas failure success rate is off the charts nahmean. Sons kinda like the Hov of wack niggas namsayin.

3. Soulja Boy

Aka the young Wally Amos. Not only is this nigga one a the softest creatures in existence...he probably the stupidest muthafucka to ever set foot on earth too. This coon spit his struggle bars on some wack ass joint called  "Let's Be Real" a little while back.... n his hoe ass had the nerve to actually say "Fuck the FBI and FUCK ALL THE ARMY TROOPS". Son. "Fuck the FBI"...cool...whatever...but hold up yo. "Fuck all the army troops" b? Like forreal son? Its bad enough that this bojangles ass muthafucka been jugglin chicken drumsticks n watermelons on records for half a damn decade now....but now he wanna get political? This niggas moms mussa fed the muthafucka fried paint chips n dead batteries while he was growin up yo...cos he fuckin beyond stupid yo. Son was definitely an ass birth b.

2.Wiz Khalifa-Rose

Aka Wiz Khagina. This lesbian nigga gotta 4th degree black belt in save-ya-ho namsayin. Son done made that shit a artform yo. Any real nigga can tell that this dude is a straight trick tho. This nigga definitely a "carry a bouquet of roses between his teeth while he climb up the fire escape to the crib of a broad he met 2 hours ago to pay her phone bills n vacuum her living room while she at work" type a nigga b.  He a lame who jus happens to smoke some weed n got hisself  inked up to cover up the fact that he a clown. This nigga probably knows how to do the Charleston n shit son. Son can probably quote Macbeth n shit b. But he gon act like he was a straight hoodlum his whole life yo. This nigga instagrammed his whole existence son. I need this nigga to fix hisself asap yo. That Amber Rose rescue aint really help nothin tho. Ayo Wiz...why cant you be more like ya brother Spitta?

1. YMCMB

As in ey'body in Young Money that aint Jae Millz, Cory Gunz or Mack Maine...jus to clarify that shit. But the rest a these muthafuckas is like the X-Men of soft ass muthafuckas son. Yall already kno that nigga Drake is the human electric slide b. This the type a cornball ass nigga who pulls up in the McDonalds drive thru to order a smile wit his meals nahmean. When he aint craftin summa the most bitchmade songs known to man he probably spends his time twirlin round in prairies n braiding blades of grass together to make clothes for wild animals n stupid shit like that yo. Nigga probably swings his window shutters open in the morning n has birds n squirrels crawlin up his curtains while he sings songs to them n shit. You might catch that nigga in the forest playin a harp or sumthin namsayin. Son probably got pictures on his walls of miniature babies sittin in fruit bowls n sproutin from gardens n shit like that. That muthafucka mussa got bit by a radioactive butterfly one day namsayin. Word is bond. Ayo son...there aint a number invented by man that could count how many times I felt like slappin the shit outta a nigga for sayin that Nicki Minaj got talent b. All I kno is I need that broad to get 5000% the fuck outta here son. And them Lil Twist n Chuckee muthafuckas is barely outta diapers b. These niggas still use bibs n sippy cups yo. Young Money might be the only label that got a jungle gym in they offices b.  Then you got that nigga Tyga...who's jus a straight crumpet muthafucka son. That nigga probably holds his hands over his mouth when he laughs yo. That 27 lb muthafucka look like he crawls round on mountains followin Sam n Frodo on his spare time son.  Ayo but somebody explain to me what Gudda Gudda's purpose in life is b. Gudda is the most dead weight nigga in any crew since Meeno was in Harlem World yo. That muthafucka makes City Spud n Murphy Lee seem like Beans n Free. Did this nigga save Weezy's life or some shit b? Speakin of that nigga... That brings us to the gardener of wackness hisself yo...Weezy "Fenomenal" Baby. Ayo son...you was rhymin like a fuckin moron on ya last album b...I cant lie yo. But that shit still had some decent joints on it. So the god aint gon pretend like he bout to stop listenin to ya shit. But you need to drop like 87% of the muthafuckas you been signin to ya label b. I see you still makin wack moves tho...cos you jus signed coon extraordinaire T-Pain. Ayo I give up son. Get these McNiggas the fuck outta here par. 

Aight peace.

What is HATE?

Ayo whattup yall its that nigga wit a mountain for a heart n volcanoes for hands nahmean....aka Big Ghost nahmean. Aka Thor Molecules...aka Phantom Raviolis...the nigga who might throw a sofa at you if you get outta line namsayin. Ayo SON....I been hearin niggas whisper in the dark on some peek-a-boo shit nahmean. Niggas is poppin they heads out the ground on some whac-a-mole shit like yo Im spose to be hittin these niggas in the head wit the hammer n shit. I seen niggas talkin wild shit like "yo that nigga Big Ghost a hater b...that nigga whole existence is garbage n he jus tryin to bring niggas down n shit fam". Meaning..."AYO WHY CANT THIS NIGGA JUS LIKE WACK SHIT LIKE WE DO SON?". Word is bond...lemme address yall little duck ass niggas one time...1) The god dont hate nobody b. I mean....dont get me wrong...a nigga definitely would like to slap the shit outta a couple niggas in the game...maybe flip a couple niggas off a rooftop...or or or beat a few niggas down usin a fire hydrant nahmean. Ya boy done thrown a couple niggas down some stairs before even...I done put hands on niggas for doin dumb shit b. The shit happens yo. I BEEN had to stomp niggas on sidewalks like we all have at one point or the other g. Thats human nature yo. I dont mean no harm like that son. It aint like I be wishin niggas kids n wives get shot up at the playground son. What a nigga tryin to say is its easy for love to get misunderstood as hate namsayin. Word is bond. If you love sumthin you might gotta harm it namsayin...n if it comes back to you then its all love son. Thats the golden rule. Niggas is takin shit too personally yo. Word is bond. 2) Fuck yall niggas. Its all love you bitch ass niggas.

Now at the same time...how a nigga spose to jus show love to jus ey'thing son? Thats like sayin you spose to salute ey'body you see when you walk down the street nahmean. Love is a form of power son. How Im gon share power wit all these muthafuckas if I dont respect how they move b? You jus a ho if you do it that way son. I respect the art before the individual nahmean. The same muthafuckas that say they got love for hip hop or for arts PERIOD jus accept the bullshit anyways son. They ALLOW the bullshit to occur yo. But when a nigga that really deserves ya respect walks thru the door how you gon jus shake that dudes hand wit the same hand you used to dap a bunch a wack niggas wit? Cmon yo...see thats where it gets fucked up. Niggas be declarin bullshit ass mixtapes classics. So what you gon call Aquemini, The Chronic or the Purple Tape now that you jus called the new DJ Khaled joint a classic? Classic-er? Niggas dont even choose what kinda snacks or morsels they wanna put in they stomach b. Its like this son... hip hop to me is like the kitchen namsayinn....its where I get my food b. So you got the fridge nahmean....where all that cold shit gets kept fresh namsayin. Thats what I fucks wit b. Lotta these young cats jus gettin they feet wet in the game is fridge niggas par. Them niggas Kendrick n Schoolboy Q...those niggas is in the fridge b. That nigga Action Bronson...he a fridge nigga. Cool Kids, Spitta, Boldy James, Elzhi...those are all fridge niggas to me nahmean. They chillin...they keepin it cold...they keep they shit crispy namsayin. 

But then you got these pantry niggas son. That nigga Drake...ayo sorry...no offense to yall Drake lovin muthafuckas...but thats a pantry nigga rite there son. Pantry niggas come from cans n plastic bags namsayin. They like prepackaged snacks nahmean. They room temperature niggas yo. They lukewarm niggas b. You aint gotta keep niggas like that in the fridge cos they aint cold son. They ready to be served bullshit niggas that TECHNICALLY got the same ingredients as the shit you find in the fridge...but these niggas got additives n preservatives yo. Thats the major labels behind em b. They jus some pop ass niggas who got the big labels behind em namsayin. They preserved...they dont need to be cold son.  These niggas is Kraft dinners. They Spam. They pork n beans. For example yo...that nigga Wiz is a pack of ramen noodles b. You jus gotta add hot water to that nigga n season his shit n you got ya little 22 cent meal son. But do these niggas bring any substance to the table tho? Hell nah son. 

In the end yo...ey'body jus tryin to make it onto the plate b. The plate is where the shit gets ate up by muthafuckas yo. Thats where niggas sit down n absorb what a muthafucka is bringin to the table. Sometimes the cold muthafuckas from the fridge get on n sometimes its the wack niggas from the pantry son. Sometimes its the niggas that come from the cupboards....the niggas you gotta refrigerate after openin. But its almost never the niggas in the freezer son. That aint no disrespect to the freezer niggas tho. Like that nigga Uncle Murda...he got a nice little single out rite now...but he resides in the freezer son. His home is the freezer namsayin. He aint never gon get on b. It jus is what it is son. Only niggas who got actual bodies on they burners be lookin forward to that niggas releases yo. His shits for niggas who rock bubble gooses wit no shirt on underneath in the winter nahmean. It dont matter if he drop a commercial joint...he aint doin nothin else to appeal to these little niggas that want flashy flamboyant ass borderline suspect niggas like Tyga reppin for they culture son. So nah...Uncle Murda aint gon be no household name someday b. Maybe if he had come onto the scene in like '92 when grimy ass niggas was gettin deals left n right yo. But not in this era son. Not in the Spa Rap Era fam. But that dont matter long as niggas get cake somehow. Niggas is jus playin the hand they was dealt namsayin. 

That brings us to a whole nother breed of muthafuckas tho...the fast food nigga. The fast food nigga is exactly what you expect yo...he the junk food son. Ayo niggas love junk food b. There aint no nutrition to that shit but niggas love that shit cos its simple n artificially flavored n got all that extra monosodium glutamate type shit in it. It aint bland...n you dont gotta think bout shit neither. There aint no nutrients or vitamins or calcium or none a that shit but its tasty n easy to get namsayin. The Waka Flocka nigga...thats a junk food ass muthafucka son. Him n his nigga OJ Da Juiceman son. The nigga Wayne? Junk food b. Lil B....I dont care how many yall niggas try to convince the god that this nigga is intelligent n here to save hip hop...he a french fry son. Straight up. That nigga is a McNugget at best son. Stop defendin this nigga. If you enjoy that shit thats great yall...but stop tryin to convince other niggas that this muthafucka is pretendin to be stupid so he can sprinkle his little jewels all over ya oatmeals son. I dont HATE em but them OFWGKTALMNOP niggas is junk food too g. Shouts to Frank Ocean tho cos I respect that dudes shit yo. But them other niggas make junk food son. Facts is facts. Soulja Boy...aka Mr Bojangles? Son that nigga is straight deep fried dog shit....nevermind bein junk food yo. Do I fucks wit any junk food personally tho? No doubt son....but it aint my whole muthafuckin diet baby pa. Summa yall livin off a straight deep fried stupidity n then washin it down wit triple thick McIgnorance shakes. That shits gon affect ya health in the end b.....that shit liable to be holdin you back in life son. Muthafuckas who devote 80GB of iPod space to Gucci Mane n friends aint gon be winnin no muthafuckin Pulitzers or Nobel Peace Prizes in the near future b. Jus like broads who kno all the words to Remy Ma's joints aint gon be the ones discoverin the cure for cancer son. This is jus simple mathematics my nigga. 

But once again yo....is it hatin? Lemme ask you this yo....does a father HATE his seeds if he feel like he gotta discipline em for some stupid shit they did? Like...does a shark HATE the fish it needs to eat in order to survive out in the oceans son? Do I HATE a muthafucka jus cos I dont want his meals anywhere near my plates g? Nah not necessarily. I jus dont like too much a that bullshit son. I aint got no sweet tooth neither...so I dont like that candy shit. I dont fuck wit none a that fluffy fruity dessert shit PERIOD son. It dont matter if its breakfast or lunch...I dont let these Del Monte fruit cup ass niggas slip into my meal plan b. Niggas is marinatin in syrup for years n then Im spose to pull that shit out the pantry n consume that shit or whatever? Nah...but summa yall niggas jus want sweet shit all day nahmean. Niggas want cake mix muthafuckas like these YMCMB niggas to be they whole diets yo (Shoutout to Cory). I can understand that a lotta yall broads be cravin that sweet shit tho....summa yall also fall for all that back n forth sensitive nigga smoke that these niggas try to blow in yalls direction too. I get that....but shame on yall lycra rockin niggas for lovin that shit too. Seriously yo. Yall should slap yallselves. 

Summa that shit from the fridge can be hard to chew tho. Summa yalls aint got teeth thats sharp enough to consume that raw shit. Yall niggas need to boil ya carrots cos you cant chew on nothin that aint soft as fuck. Niggas is all bout that baby food. Im a grown man son....I dont need no baby food yo. Theres a reason why I dont argue wit youngins son...niggas whose facebook statuses in 94 woulda been "Word...bout to go fertilize this egg. Gon miss swimmin in this nutsack tho :'-(" dont got opinions that matter to me like that son.  Muthafuckas on twitter whose tweets is like "Yo slime...Clifford the big red dog is a muthafuckin fool LOOooooB!" aint gon change my mind bout nothin when they start stickin up for Tyga n Lil Twist n all these other cake mix ass lesbian niggas yo. Yall niggas go watch ya little Wizards of Waverly Place bullshit n leave the heavy thinkin to muthafuckas thats old enough to see R-rated movies yo. I aint fuckin wit yall. Im gon burn this muthafucka down. iCarly aint got shit on me. You talkin to a Staten Island nigga son. We only drink rain water over here nigga. We eat broken glass n punch holes in the sidewalk first thing in the morning over here son. We dont respect the niggas that you do. The niggas that yall run n hide from be washin niggas cars over here son. Those niggas you scared of run to the store n buy a nigga his Snapples b. You talkin to a1500 thread count nigga thats official son. Step ya thread counts up little niggas. Get ya little flannel bullshit away from me yo. Nex time you see the god tuck ya chain in n salute me...you big mouth niggas. N remember yo...I aint here to change nobodys mind bout nothin son...Imma be happy if I can jus get a few muthafuckas to think tho. 

Aight peace.

By the way yo.....

COMING SOON

Ayo this the lost Carter IV song....feat. Jay-Z

Ayo whattup this ya boy Thor Molecules aka Zeus Almighty namsayin. Word is bond yo the god was jus chillin on his balcony pourin his rozay n doin his Sunday afternoon shit nahmean. Ayo all a sudden the sun disappeared nahmean...then the skies opened apart n I seen a light that looked like two hands openin up yo. The hands was made from clouds....n then a mighty falcon emerged from within its palms namsayin. Word is bond...the falcon was made outta lava n was flyin down from the skies towards Tones balcony n it had fire blowin out its nostrils son. The falcon roared n it swirled over the gods balcony n did some acrobatic shit nahmean. Word...n then the falcon dropped some fiery bird shit on my balcony namsayin. N then all a sudden the muthafucka flew back into the clouds. Ayo the god approached the fiery birdshit n I seen sumthin within the birdshit yo. Ayo son I seen a iPod. Tone picked the iPod up n I seen it was one a the wack Nano joints yo. But it was made from gold b. N there was only one joint on the muthafucka....the joint had no name. But I peeped it yo. When I heard the shit comin out from the little jelly ear buds a nigga said to hisself OH SHIT...THIS THE LOST CARTER IV JOINT.........featurin Jay-Z. There wasnt no hook or nothin...jus niggas spittin they bars n that was it. The beat itself was some other shit yo...I had visions of gladiators drivin race cars n shit...wit volcanoes explodin on the track son. The words to the joint appeared on the clouds as I was hearin the shit g. A nigga was amazed yo. But then it occured to a nigga why the shit aint make it on the album b.....cos these niggas was lowkey takin shots at eachother yo. N as the song ended the iPod exploded n turned to dust yo. So I scribed the words that was still upon the clouds nahmean. N as ya boy finished writin the words down...lightnin shot down from the clouds n zapped the floor of a niggas patio son. All a sudden a nigga layin in his waterbed surrounded by lions n half nekkid broads namasayin....shit went back to normal yo. So a nigga felt as tho he had awoken from a dream yo. But then I looked on the wall...ayo n the words I had scribed from the song was on the wall son...N this is what a nigga remembered from the song...I named the shit Fiery Balconies since it aint had no official name yo.

Aight peace.

Fiery Balconies - Lil Wayne feat. Jay-Z

Jay-Z:





Turn the muthafuckin music up



Yeahhh



Yeaaaahhh!



I got these niggas Weezy!



Heheheheheheheheheheh....



You might cop a watch like mine, homie, but this a different BEZel

We both floatin on our yachts homie, but this a different VESssssel

The one ya boy ridin on is a little bit more SPESH-ull

Cos we both be gettin dough, but homie, Hov makes bigger PRETZels



OH.....We aint count-in the same DEC-i-mals

Listen, my nigga, we aint even speakin the same DEC-i-bels

Thought I told ya'll niggas that this rap shit was my BITCH, fam

Plus I 'ready told ya'll, I'm not a HITman, I'm a HIT, maaaaaan



Pokerface'd the game n now I'm steady stackin CHIPS, man

Use ta FLIP grams, but then it EXpand-ed, SHIT man, look what I WITH-stand-ed

Damn....Tell me WHO in HIStory did it like THIS man

The Beatles before they DISbanded, maybe MJ, maybe PRINCE man



Even Elvis had to BOW DOWN, when his CROWN BOUNCED, look what they FOUND OUT

That boy Young ain't the one you COUNT OUT, let's see THAT from a lil nigga DOWN SOUTH

Niggas talkin breezy n run outta breath n get weezy

Thinkin those messages is for themmm jus because they been gettin cc'ed



You wanna BATTLE dog? Fuck that, lets compare catalogs...

compare bank accounts, compare travel logs, compare passports, n THEN have a talk

Niggas think they got bite, jus cos they have a bark

Cos the niggas who ain't got cars will tell you they rather walk...Haa!



Yall niggas is avatars....to be honest, I aint even mad at ch'all

You pour ya cup n mafuckas jus rather grab a straw.....

They like fiends, the way they rock back n forth

like that's a cure...HUH



Niggas can't act mature.....

N everybody think they TU-pack Shakurs

Niggas brave after two packs a Coors, Two packs? OF COURSE

Triple entendre you bastards off



Soon as our mafuckin paths have crossed,

Who you tryna renegade? You just a Asher Roth

Never pushed out the game due to lack a force

Plus my nigga Wayne jus adds support....HUH

Lil Wayne:





Helluh errybuddy it's that nigguhYoung Tunechi

Lookit all these nigguhs tryna eat off of muh fruit tree

I read a pussay ass muhfucka like a book

Bwoy I POP a pussay nigguh...kick his ass like uh foot...hyeeaah



Nigguh so paid you should call meh Mr Paid

Old nigguhs so sour we should call um lemonade

Bitch I got yachts like a muthfuckin dock

Tunechi spit so haaawrd they should jus call mehhh Raaawck



I pop a pussy nigguh, POP UM POP UM like balloons

Damn I sweep a muhfucka off his feet, brooms

Bout to blow shit up once again nigguh, boom

You nigguhs is dead to meh like dead people, tombs



Bitch I go so hard they should call a nigguh Hardy

N yall muthafuckas want some beef wit Tune, Arbys

So many bitches in the ruoohm bwoy, bacardi

Tunechi is tha tunafish...yall nigguhs is sawrdeens...hyeeack



Bwoy Im goin in, you should call meh dildo

Get yuh ass kicked, you should call yuhself field goal

Weezy rock so much ice, you should call meh real cold

Got so many rings they should call me Bilbo....hyeahhh



...Get yuh ass laid down like floor tile

Drizzy got dem sweaters, you should call him young orrhgyle

Nigguh so hot yuh should call me Atlantuhh

N bitch, real B's move in silence like buhnanas



Nigguh um paid, yuh should call meh Darth Paider

Showed muh nigguh Drizzy how to handle light sabers

Muhfucka um jus livin life fast forwardin

Goin so fast, yuh should call me Flash Gawrdin



Weezy F Baby from the city of New Awrlins

Nigguhs get scared when they hear muh pants roarrrin

Shoutout my nigguhs Gudda, Mack Maine n Aurrrbry

Young Money bwoy, fuck errybody....orgy.